I'm sorry

That I didn't keep my promise.

J.

Her whole life was devoted to her husband and kids. Now that they are moving on she has nothing. Everything she talks about relates to them. I think that's great; but I don't want that for myself.

Iwant to be able to live and have a life. Not everything that comes out of my mouth should be about my children or husband. That would make me unhappy and I just don't know how people can do it.

Getting me some education

I took the GRE yesterday and I am pretty sure I failed. The math section was ridiculously hard, but then again I've never been good at math. I can't believe that I started college 4 years ago. It seems unreal. I am hoping to get start the masters program at sdsu next fall. That is kind of crazy. I have interviews for jobs and for a grant that could potentially pay for my graduate education. HOW CRAZY IS THAT? Not having to worry about school would be awesome.

I feel like I'm constantly busy. Which is great. But I also feel like life is just passing me by. I am constantly studying and I feel like I'm not living. I have planned two vacations for the end of this year so I am excited about that. I think it will be nice to have a weekend getaway since I didn't have a summer.

Ahh sooo ssttreeeesseedd!

'Cause I'm not fine at all...

Time won't fly

After plaid shirt days and night when you made me your own,
Now you mail back my things and I walk home alone.
But you keep my old scarf from that very first week because it reminds of you innocence and it smells like me.

But you can't get rid of it.
Cause you remember it all too well.

-TS.

Enough is enough, right?

When do you reach the point of no return?
When is it time to call it quits?
When do you give up on a relationship?
If the same things keep happening again and again, things should end right?
If there are no improvements, things should end right?
If you thought they were getting better and it turns out to be a facade, things should end right?

Right.

Right?

Teaching

Why is it that teachers are so underpaid? It is a profession that helps all professions. I make a small amount of money for being an early childhood educator; many of you would say I work in a day care but I don't. I help the children with a lot of things you may not even know about.
I plan curriculum that caters to the children's interest but yet teaches them something as well. It could be their fine motor skills, which help with writing, or it could be their turn taking skills. There is a wide range of things I teach them and the fact that I am under appreciated and under paid makes me upset.
Unfortunately I am looking for another job that pays better because I need to support myself. It is difficult to even live off what I have which is why I am grateful my rent is very cheap. I love what I do. Honestly.

Pizza night

"He was so sweet! I remember one time for my birthday he got me a bunch of white roses and painted the tips of them blue, because that was my favorite color"

"So why are you with S?"

"Because he makes me laugh. He got me hooked."

Nothing to worry about

I don't want him back.